Cute Panda In China Eats Stupid Person


Yeah, that’s what’s left of the dude’s fibula.    Ughhh….Disgusting.

Ok, not really. The bear didn’t actually eat the person, but it did send them to the hospital with arms and legs that are now well ventilated.

Read story here:

Ouch, yeah?  Man, who knew pandas were such a terrifying menace.

Clearly not this student who upon seeing how warm and fuzzy the panda bear looked, climbed over the six and a half foot fence at the Chinese zoo and…well, hugged it.  …Aww.

Yeah, well unfortunately the panda bear wasn’t a cartoon or a man dressed in a panda bear outfit.  It was an actual panda bear and sadly didn’t realize that when faced with a hairless primate that’s reaching for its neck, that it’s supposed to gently hug back and say “I love you too”.

Stupid panda.

The bewildered and bloodied student was later asked at the hospital why he had done what he did, and replied, ” well, the panda was so cute and cuddly that I never expected to be bitten.”  Amazing.  (And amazing that he replied in English. See article.)  And instead of smacking the No on Prop 8 kid on the head, the reporter responded back with, “You know what else is really cute and cuddly?…..Tigers.”

I will update you on that future story when it arises.


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