Why Did The Turkey Cross The Road?

No, I didn’t screw up the delivery to a joke. I muttered this line a few days ago when, literally, a turkey strutted across the rode in front of my car. For some reason, there are turkeys roaming loose all over the East Bay. I don’t know what’s going on. I think I’ve literally seen fifty of these things in the past year, and probably in four of five different locations. Just fully pumped up birds strolling around thinking they’re pigeons or something.

And these things aren’t small either. Or the size one usually thinks a turkey should be. These things are f-in massive. They look like 3rd graders dressed up as turkeys for a Thanksgiving assembly or something.

Come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve ever been face to face with a real pre-cooked turkey before this year. The closest I came maybe was my five-fingered turkey creations I made in art class. And those weren’t big. They were….well they were this size of my nine year old right hand (I’m a southpaw).

I don’t know. Maybe this is somehow linked with the alien shit going on. Maybe this is the beginning of the infiltration. Cause again, they look a little too big. I’m not nervous, but I’m a little uneasy.

BN